It's one of the greatest sins and
yet it's something we do day after day. Sometimes we don't even realise
it. You're just chatting away with your friends and you begin to talk about
somebody else. Our whole lives are based around 'Home and Away' and 'Neighbours',
soaps based on lying, backbiting etc. But look at what the Prophet (saw)
said about it: The Prophet (saw) was sitting with his companions one day
and one of them was speaking badly about someone who wasn't there. As the
man got up to leave the Prophet (saw) said to him: "Pick Your Teeth!"
"But I haven't eaten anything." The man protested. "No" the Prophet (saw)
said "YOU HAVE EATEN THE FLESH OF YOUR DEAD BROTHER". As Allah tells us
in the Quran "Would any of you like to eat the flesh of his dead
brother? No, you would hate it." (Ch49: v12)
But What If It's True?!
The Prophet (saw) told us "Backbiting
is to say something about someone they wouldn't like said about them....If
what bad you said about them is true, then you have backbited and if it
is false then you have slandered them." (MUSLIM)
If you're still not convinced of
how big a sin backbiting really is, then look at the punishment Allah has
in store for the backbiters. The Prophet (saw) described: "On the night
of mirage I passed by some people who had metal hooks in their hands and
were clawing at their faces and their necks with them. I asked Gabriel
'Who were these people?' He said 'These are the people who eat the flesh
of human beings and disgrace them' (Abu Dawud).
This is how big of a sin backbiting
is looked upon and yet we continue to backbite without a second thought,
next time you lie, talk about somebody, remember Allah (swt) and the Prophet
(saw) and put them in front of you before you speak.
Just having a Laugh!
May be we think it's all right to
take the mick out of someone so long as we say it to their face. 'We'll
make fun of the way someone talks, walks, or how they look. Allah warns
us against such behaviour: "O you who believe. Let not some men laugh at
others, it may be the that they are better than you. Nor let some women
laugh at others it may be that they are better than you. Nor abuse each
other , nor be sarcastic to each other by using offensive nicknames..."
(Ch49v11)
Don't forget that Allah made us the
way we are, so how can you even think of making fun of his creation?
Cool to Swear?
Listen to yourself and to your friends
speaking one day - nearly every sentence will have a swear word in it,
thinking it's cool and macho to swear, copying the idols of TV and the
cinema. Is it really 'cool' to swear? The Hellfire is far from being cool.
People will wish they were cool then rather than being cool in this world.
Remember! That every time you speak , an angel writes down what you say,
and that one day you will have to answer for every single word you ever
uttered. So if you swear at someone then it's written down as a sin against
you. You're only harming yourself. The Prophet (saw) said that "Abusing
a Muslim is a sin and fighting with him is disbelief." (MUSLIM).
'But sometimes you just have to
swear'!
We've all been there - you're just
so angry with somebody and the only way you can express yourself, is to
swear at them. The solution? ...
Don't get angry in the first place
A man came to the Prophet (saw) one
day and said "Advise me". The prophet (saw) said "Don't become angry. Don't
become angry. Don't become angry"....
"When one of you gets angry while
he is standing up, he should sit down. Then anger will leave him, and if
not then he should lie down" (Ahmad). So let us follow this beautiful advice
of the Prophet (saw) and remember that anger is from shaitan. If someone
angers you or swears at you then don't harm yourself by doing the same
but respond in a better way as Allah says in the Quran "Repel evil with
what is better. Then he who was your worst enemy will become your best
friend." (Ch41v33)
"It wasn't me. Honest."
How often do we say such a phrase
or say that "I was only joking". We treat lies as being trivial. However
we are told that "Allah's messenger did not hate anything more than lying"(Ahmed).
The Prophet (saw) was once asked "Can a Muslim be a coward?" He (saw) replied
"Yes." and then asked "Can a Muslim be a miser?" and the reply was "Yes."
The Prophet (saw) was then asked "Can a Muslim be a liar?" The Prophet
(saw) replied "NO! A Muslim can never be a liar". Furthermore, he said
"Truth leads to virtue and virtue leads to paradise...Lying leads to wickedness
and wickedness leads to the hellfire." (Bukhari). As we know that one lie
leads to another ten lies which lead to bad actions. Remember you can lie
and think that you have
got away with it but on the day
of Judgement your hands, tongue and feet will bear testimony against you
and tell the truth.
But it's only words!
One day one of the companions asked
the Prophet (saw) "O Messenger of Allah. Will we be called to account for
what we say?" He replied "May you be lost to your mother - people will
be thrown, faces down into the hellfire, only on account to what their
tongues said." (Tirmidhi).
Indeed the tongue controls the rest
of your body. A well controlled tongue will keep us within Islam but a
loose tongue will destroy us. The Prophet (saw) said "When a person
gets up in the morning, all the parts of his body make a plea to his tongue
saying; 'Fear Allah regarding us, because we follow you. If you are right
then we shall also be right , and if you are wrong then we shall also be
wrong." (Tirmidhi)
Instead of swearing, lying and engaging
in useless talk we can use our tongues in better ways and what better than
telling people about Islam. Allah says "Who is better in speech than one
who calls (men) to Allah and works righteousness and says I am one of those
who bow down in Islam" (Ch 41v33)
Your tongue can save you as well!
Indeed if you control your tongue
and speak good then paradise can be yours. The Prophet (saw) said "Whoever
can guarantee me two things I can guarantee them Paradise." The companions
asked "What O Messenger of Allah?" He replied "What is between his jaws
(his tongue) and his legs (private parts)." (Bukhari)
I've lied and backbited, sworn and
made fun of others. I must be doomed I must be going to hell!"
NO! Allah (swt) tells us in the Quran:
"O my servants who have wronged themselves. never despair of the mercy
of Allah for truly he forgives all sins. He is the Forgiving, the Merciful."
(Ch39v53)
So if you really repent and turn
back to Allah and promise not to commit the sin again then truly Allah's
promise is true and He will forgive you.
If you've backbitten someone - go
and tell the person whom you backbited and apologise sincerely and ask
them to forgive you. But if you think that the situation will get worse
then turn back to Allah sincerely begging for his forgiveness then to make
up for what you said, go around and talk good of him.
The Best Example
As we know that the best person to
have ever lived is the Prophet Muhammad (saw) and he is the best of example
for mankind. If we follow him we can never go wrong. Ayesha (RA) the Prophet's
wife described the Prophets conduct as follows "He was neither a obscene
talker nor a user of bad words. He did not shout nor did he repay evil
with evil. He used to forgive people and overlook their sins." (Tirmidhi)
Final Advice: A beautiful saying
of the Prophet (saw) that will ensure the protection of our tongue. The
Messenger of Allah (saw) said "Whoever believes in Allah and the Last day,
LET HIM EITHER SPEAK GOOD OR KEEP SILENT" (Agreed upon)
The Tongue
