I have severe depression

I have Iron deficiency--for life

I have severe migraines--for more than 4 years

I have no relationship with either of my parents--or any of my relatives for that matter

I have no friends

I’ll never get married

I’ll never be happy

I’ll never fall in love or even in-like

I’ll never succeed in life regardless of how much I try

I’ll always be on medication

I fear that I’ll end in a mental institute

I fear that I’ll lose what’s left of my memory

I fear that I won’t know who I’m

I fear that I’ll be abandoned

But mostly I fear that I wont live for long

I’m not living…I’m just surviving. I don’t want to die, because I’m not ready to face ALLAH and I don’t have the confidence to stand before ALLAH as he decides my destiny, however this pain is powerfully overwhelming and thus as result I‘m psychologically and emotionally dead.

I can't believe this is it. I can't believe I have to live with this demon--depression this very much looks like a battle that I'll not win...Bursts into tears.

ALLAHU AKBAR!